The nerve of this Cat!
- Ooooh! Oh no he din't! I should have had that cat destroyed when I had the chance! He keeps writing horrible and untrue things about me in his Catster diary. He made a metaphor suggesting my life's value is equivalent to a can of rotten 40 cent catfood! The nerve! How could anyone feel pity for this spiteful feline and his vitriol? He threatened to cut me! I hope there's a police officer reading this site who can testify on my behalf or perhaps find Oasis wherever he types and shoot him.
Do not feel sorry for Oasis. I've always known there was a dark side to him. I was watching The Smurfs one day and you should've seen the way he reacted when Azrael, Gargamel's incorrigible cat, came on the screen. He was springing up and down and kneading the TV. You could see the mania in his eyes. Oh! And then that time I rented Pet Semetary--Oasis rolled around on the floor in bliss and batted his paws together whenever the evil zombie cat was up to something.
Like I said before, take down that vicious slander on your site right now!