Oasis is Given an Option
oasis' Glamour Shot, originally uploaded by winneroftheSAT
I asked for some advice from the friendly folks in the the Craigslist Pet Forum on what to do with Oasis and I received some real guidance:
Catmom idiotically writes:
“You know goddamn well that if you spent a sliver of the energy you gleefully fritter away on publicly playing "god" with that cat's life, and instead spent the energy on how to re-home him, your problem would be solved by now. I'm here with my beloved cat of 15.5 years knocking at death's door right now - due to serious URI he innocently caught from a newly adopted 4 yo cat (who arrived with broken promises of health). You don't deserve to read the details of his suffering, because you'd probably enjoy it. If you were on the left coast, I'd plan a day trip just to come bitch-slap some sense into your juvenile morbid ass. But since you're 3000 miles away I'll have to settle for knowing that, as sure as sun rises & sets each day, the disgusting karma you send out WILL INDEED boomerang to kick your ass one day.”
Luvthemcritters thoughtlessly says:
“[Blogging down the days until you take Oasis to the vet] passes a bad message to people. I think if people have the time to produce this kind of crap, they could be picking up trash or making lunches for the elderly or something that will make a difference.”
Anonymous 1 bores:
“Place a real ad, at the very least, man. Try your local newspaper and rescue groups. Or, post flyers if you can abandon your precious blogs and forget your SAT score long enough to do so.”
Anonymous 2 blathers:
“Let me guess, you were an only child and you pull stupid shit like this to get attention from your parents. Well get over it, just except the fact that you have failed as a human being. I would wish you to be reincarnated as a cat that is in the same situation as your cat...But then I would have to pity you b/c you would be a helpless animal. So instead I shall wish you a great big "Fuck you" and I hope we never meet in person... Adios Ass-hole”
So, in light of all the suggestions I’ve been given, I decided to grant Oasis an option. For the next 24 hours, I will leave the door to the apartment wide open. I looked the cat straight in the eyes and decreed, “Oasis, should you wish to choose life over inevitable death, the door is now permeable. I pray that you navigate out of the apartment complex, for your fate here is grim. Do you understand the words coming out of my mouth?”
He stared me down with his attentive leonine gaze and then coughed up the biggest furball I’ve ever seen. Hacking and convulsing his entire body, Oasis spat a mass of hair and saliva and unknowables onto the wood floor. The clump of indigestibles spooled about and the cat defiantly placed it's paw on the furball to squish it into the paneling.
So the gauntlet is thrown, is it Oasis? You think you can make it in this cold world without me? You are nothing. Nothing without me. The door is open!